- A Complete History of the Soviet Union As Told By A Humble Worker, Arranged To The Melody Of Tetris
To Moscow I came seeking fortune
But they’re making me work til I’m dead
The bourgeoisie have it so easy
The Tsar’s putting gold on his bread
The people of Moscow are hungry
But think what a feast there could be
If we could create a socialist state
That cared for the people like me:
- Busking
We like to busk on the underground
We stand in a corner right here
But the licensing men in some office
They come and they just interfere
They’re censoring all of our lyrics
It’s such a remarkable thing
They give us some new words each morning
- Climat Change Denier
Oh, he don’t have time for no scientists
He says they don’t agree
Likes to spend his time on the Internet
Shows him what he wants to see
He will drive you around in his Jaguar
He’s a BA frequent flyer
He’s a middle-class, middle-brow, middle-weight, middle-aged
Climate change denier
- Derrick the Evil Pigeon
There’s a nasty little pigeon who is pecking at my garden
He is Derrick!
He is evil!
You will see him in the city when you’re eating a panini
He is Derrick the evil pigeon!
He lives upon the pickings of the labour of the people
He is Derrick!
- Hitler's Favorite Song
I had a little cheeseburger, he was my only friend.
I took him to the picture house and loved him til the end.
I had a Venus flytrap on my windowsill
And he ate all the flies that came in my room.
Please don’t tread on my cheeseburger,
He’s my only friend in the whole wide world.
Please don’t tread on my cheeseburger,
- Howard Hughes Blues
Well it started quite innocently when I was young
And obsessed with the physics of aeroplane wings
And among other things, with the sizes of peas
Which my special fork sorts with the greatest of ease
I was raised by rich parents, I tell you they daren’t
Permit me to walk with the snails and woodlice
So that’s why kleenex boxes for shoes are so nice
- My Darling
My darling, believe me, my love for you is true
If you were to leave me, I know not what I’d do
And so tonight I thought I might let all my feelings show
And I will take you to the most romantic place I know
Come with me to the cockfight my dear, come see the fearless fowl
The bell is like beautiful music to me succeeded by shriek and howl
Come with me to the cockfight tonight, come see them bite and scratch
- The Lonely Shepherd
There’s a girl in the village called Sally
And her beauty is truly divine
But Sally, alas, has a husband
So Sally will never be mine.
But one night when her husband was sleeping
She invited me out for some fun
I still dream of that one night with Sally:
- The Unfortunate End Of Miguel The Matador
Miguel the matador’s prowess was second to none
With a cape and a sword, so adored in the afternoon sun
Year upon year they would cheer for the star of the ring
But it meant not a thing
He felt no excitement, a searing indictment
On quite how dull it was to win
Again and again and again and again