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You think
it doesn't matter, and I'll just say whatever,
but it does make me feel an awful lot.
more than i need
to be dealing with right now, but so it goes (and it goes too often).
give me a minute to cool down now, I'm fogging up my lenses.
I'm trying to understand your thoughts,
they don't really add up.

In letting go, I've reaffirmed again, restated
I've come to know that cutting ties is overrated.
some months ago, too busy getting all too lazy
in thought, I knew
i've got to run instead of standing still

never enough,
ever enough

you're ice cold, sure told me so.
and I can't say what my mind holds.
sense of wonder permeates my headspace.
not enough strength to hold up the roof.

or the crumbling walls,
or the rotted out door;
foundations unstable.

the torrent is sweeping me out to the vast horizon
unfortunately plain to see through the shrouded distance
and when and when it comes to what it will i know what course to take?
and when we grind to a halt, I'll hold on to no mistakes

keep on searching for clarity, or honesty, or something worth remembering.
keep on finding what I am not trying to seek - anything and everything.

Every morning,
I believe that I need to change, but every night I wind up stuck in my old ways.
My afternoons are always all the same, and when midnight rolls around, I'm the only place to blame.
I haven't been able to sleep at night without feeling like I just wanna start a fight.
Temper, temper, I know. I wish. But something inside is just about to give

You're so shallow, I can see right through.
I'll just laugh at all the shit you think you can pull.

if you'd like to take a while,
listen to the motions of dust,
the particles that sound
when we're still here.
given, I might rather fly
freely through the windy breeze,
sail over the open seas and find us out.

The most important lesson I've learned is that nothing's worth fighting for.
Maybe it seems absurd, but my heart's finally hit the floor.
Motivationally dependent on something more.
I hear what you say, but I can't listen anymore.

I wish I could make something honest out of this
instead of sinking into shallows and balling fists.
I'm only trying to smile, but instead,

in the water, I started to swim
it was scary but i jumped right in.
doing dives instead of sinking
down to the bottom
when it's shallow, I came up for air
looked around and you're still there.
It's relieving to know.

Sleeping with the lights on, passed out on the couch.
Waking up, my head felt like a sack of bricks, like a thousand pounds.
Feeling like a picture doesn't take much time.
Again, I discover everything I try to say gets convoluted anyway.

When I try to retrace all my thoughts,
pencilmarks fade.
When I wanna discover where I've gone,

maybe jealousy has my number
maybe I'm too gone too care
tell myself nothing is a bother,
but I see you there.
indifference is just so appealing
falling for all the traps life set.
giving into all the feelings
trapped in my head

I just think in shapes and patterns
It's not all that complicated,
but I never could do the math.
It's not all that big a deal
so I'll stand on this platform, and soon I'll be on my way
I've been thinkin 'bout just not thinking at all
I think it's time to let my guard fall
Wait for your call

I've fallen down, surprise,
but picked myself up again.
trial by choice, trial by fire.
it's time to find
a way to push though the thick and then
come out alive, refreshing reminder
done right takes time, I've learned. I haven't been giving in.
holding my breath, pauses extended.

i've been taking a break, oh what a waste.
running circles for weeks, and now i'm hardly awake.
the longer I wait, the more time it takes
to formulate thoughts, do what I say

my room is a mess, unlike my head -
i've been sorting out problems and making more sense.
It's warmer again, I'm using my pen

coming close to the finish line
adrenaline pumping one more time
I'm at my peak when I'm down the line
but now's the time to shine
coming down to the wire again,
the only time things are happening.
sit on my ass, and I won't stop

Well, I hope no one is gonna see this old thing,
I almost hope it burns, forgotten.
I don't think I can just brush it off.
Things like this will stick here for a while.

I need more time to define the divide
To see the world, let my shoes get dusty,
clean the spills and the stains.

it's freezing
my hands are cold and cracked now.
I forgot
the words that'll make me come around.
where is
the productivity exalted?
it's obvious
I've worked my fingers till exhausted.

Ты появилась на свет двадцать три года назад,
С того далекого дня, ты начала свой путь в ад!
Чтоб как-то жить с твоей мамой, твой папа носит стакан,
Ты родилась некрасивой, но твоя гордость - твой стан.
Твои прекрасные формы мечта любого самца,
Твоя убогая жизнь - это начало конца!
Ты медсестра в горбольнице, там ты посланник богов,
И ты могла бы быть лучше, но у тебя нет мозгов!!!