Amateur Transplants все тексты (слова) песен, переводы, видео, клипы

Half way through Mamma Mia at the Cinemaplex
I let rip with a fart that straight away I regret
Buggering hell, then I notice a worrying smell
And I suddenly lose control, and there's a fire within my hole

All my strength goes into clenching my ring
But it's too late and I expel everything
Oh no!

Everybody wonders what anesthetists do while the patient is asleep
Everybody wonders what we do for three hours while that machine goes beep
Everybody reckons we drink coffee and we gossip and we're generally subversive
Everybody reckons we do crosswords and Sudoku and we chat up all the nurses
But do you really think that's all we do?
Well, let me tell you now it isn't true!
'Cause we sometimes check the screen
And every now and then we write stuff

My life is brilliant
My name is James
I'm only 7
And that explains
Why I've never had a best friend
Until you came along
But people stop and they look at us and they say that it's wrong

I feel so unsure
As I cut you up
I wonder what's that nerve for
What does this bit do
I get so confused
I am very sorry Mr. Smith
I've got some dreadful news

Say hi to the Professor, I'm your new House Officer And I've heard the rumour that you're no good at removing tumours You've got no ability, you're a liability And you can't deny that all you patients seem to die.

But what you don't see is it comes down to me To try and explain again and again To relatives why their loved ones have dies you see

Tell me, why does every op you do lead to compications? It makes it very hard for me to try to explain to their relations Why the patient cannot pee, cannot see, has PE, DVT, HIV - yeah, its my duty Promise me you won't be doing any more operations, no, no, no

A couple of weeks agio the kids had a big surprise,
The turned on the Cartoon Network and couldn't believe their eyes.

The animals on the cartoons had left the screens and escaped,
They wandered the streets and they had adopted their natural states.

Wasn't it grand? Wasn't it great?
When the cartoons all went and assumed their natural states.

Ascites, Edema, Appendix, Anemia,
Embolus, Embryo, Eczema, Chain-Stokes,
Empathy, Apathy, Atopy, Allergy,
Autism, Autopsy, Arthroscopes,

Infarction, Infection, Induction, Injection,
Inspection, Palpations, Phlebotomy, Mumps,
Bicuspid, Bipolar, Bigeminy, Biceps,

Do come in,
Please close the door,
Thankyou,
Tell me what
How long has this been for?
Does it feel the same?
Is there any bleeding?
With this burning, or just internal pain?

How to take a history has aways been a mystery?
How to find a JVP?
How to take a pulse?
Asking patients about sex
Supinator reflex
Skin bumps, necl lumps
Now give me a cough!
MMR, BCG, Meningitis, DTP

Oh I’ll never forget how we met, Dear
On that specialist site on the net, Dear
Where you taught me the uses
Of handcuffs and nooses
We danced to the masochism tango!

Oh you used to bring home those pipe-cleaners
And stick half a dozen down my penis

Once a month your girl's upset
She goes to Boots to buy Lilets
It happens every 28 days,
When she's in her Luteal phase.
All she does in moan and nag,
You go five days without a shag
There's no cunnilingus
You can only use your fingers